Dating for Widows Over 50: 11 Expert Tips 


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Losing a spouse is one of the hardest things to go through. You essentially lose your best friend and the person you did everything with. But, once you’ve come to terms with the loss, you may find yourself longing for another partner to spend the rest of your life with, and wonder if there’s someone out there willing to give you a chance. 

Some dating tips for widows over 50 include dating another widower, don’t start dating until you feel ready, and don’t talk about your late spouse on the first date unless you’re asked, among other things.

It can be scary to go into the dating world when you’re a widow over 50, though. However, you’re human and all humans want to have deep, social connections. Read on for more great tips to get the next phase of your life started.

Dating for Widows Over 50: 11 Expert Tips 

Be Honest About Your Age 

It might be tempting to lie about your age, especially if you look younger than you really are. But while it can make you feel more youthful and perhaps even get you more dates, it’s best not to lie. 

If you end up in a long-term relationship with the person you’re dating, they’ll appreciate your honesty. Lying about something like your age can break the relationship apart or cause your date to think you lie about everything.

Don’t be ashamed of your age; it’s just a number! It’s the way you act and your attitude that determines how attractive you are.  

Date Another Widower

Another widower will understand the journey you’ve been through. This may make it easier to have conversations about how you’re feeling, which always makes a relationship stronger. It may also make certain things you do seem less awkward to the one you’re dating. 

For example, if you keep photos of your late partner around, a fellow widower would understand without needing an explanation. Or, if you randomly cry because a place reminds you of your spouse, they won’t ask a bunch of questions or judge you.

You’ll both be on the same wavelength and understand the ups and downs of life after a significant loss.  

Don’t Talk About Your Late Spouse on the First Date Unless They Ask

It might seem natural to talk about your late spouse, but consider not doing so on the first date. It might make things awkward, especially if you become emotional. 

Your date might not know what to say to you, and this might make them uncomfortable or scare them away. If they ask, you can try to keep it brief, so you don’t go into an emotional spiral. Once things get a bit more serious, then you can talk about it in more detail. 

That being said, it’s also very important to stay natural and genuine on a first date. So don’t pretend you’re a different person just for the sake of not talking about your late spouse.

Don’t Date Until You Feel Ready 

Your family or friends might be pressuring you into dating again. But, things won’t work out if you’re not ready. 

Whatever you do, don’t force yourself to get out there. Your heart and mind won’t be focused on finding someone to connect with. Take time to grieve—everyone does so at their own pace. Once you’ve grieved, you’ll feel a lot lighter, and dating will come more naturally. You’ll be happier and able to communicate about your late spouse in a more positive and constructive way. 

Don’t Try to Replace Your Late Spouse

Of course, you’ll miss your late spouse, and you’ll probably want to find someone similar to them. 

But there’s no one out there who can replace your previous spouse. And if you go searching for someone to do so, you’ll only end up disappointed and trying to change someone. You could also end up hurting the other person because they may feel they may never live up to your expectations.

Remember, each person has their own special qualities and are lovable in their own way. It’s okay to miss and appreciate your late spouse, but don’t ignore a great person if they’re in front of you now.

Be Yourself 

As always, it’s important to be yourself when beginning to date again. 

You may feel different because an important part of your life is gone, or you may want to change other aspects of yourself because you want to reinvent yourself, but don’t! Otherwise, you’ll come across as inauthentic and insecure. 

Just be yourself, flaws and all. Your journey has made you a stronger person with a story to tell. You’ll find someone who connects with you and loves you for you. 

Don’t Be Afraid to Date Someone Younger 

Don’t feel restricted to your age group when dating after the loss of a spouse. You can date younger if you’d like to or if a younger guy or girl flirts with you. 

As we stated previously, age is just a number. It may be refreshing to get some new perspectives and be introduced to cool technology or whatever else the younger generation is into these days. It can make you feel excited about life again. 

Define Your Desires

Take some time to reflect on what it is you’re looking for when dating. You’re a different person than you were the last time you dated, so your desires will be different. 

For example, when you were younger, you were likely looking for someone to build a family with. Now, you may have older kids or be established in your career, so your focus has shifted. Perhaps you’re looking for someone to travel or someone who simply makes you laugh, regardless of their financial status.

Get Busy With Activities 

It’s important to stay busy by participating in some hobbies or going out with your friends. When dating, your partner wants to know that you’re not just sitting around waiting for them to call. Otherwise, they may really believe they’re just dating an old man or woman who needs someone to take care of them. 

So, join a class, visit your local community center or partake in some kind of creative activity at home. It spices things up when you’re well rounded and have interests of your own. It’ll give you something to talk about when you go on dates, or you can even go on a date to do the activity together.

Join a Support Group

These days, there are support groups for just about everything. You can probably find a support group for widows in your city or a nearby city if you look hard enough. 

When you’re there, you’ll likely meet other widows or find someone through a member of the support group. Besides meeting a potential dating partner, joining a support group can help you through the grieving process so that you feel ready to date again. 

Join a Dating Site for Widows 

Just as there are dating sites for Christians, farmers, college students, and other groups of people, there are dating sites for widows. 

Some of these sites include Elite Singles and Silver Singles. It may be nice to narrow down the dating pool to fellow widowers, and these sites make it simple. Online dating is also great because you can build your confidence through messaging before meeting potential partners face to face.

Conclusion  

It could be hard to date when you’re a widow over 50, but it doesn’t have to be. 

This article outlined some expert tips to help you get back into that phase of your life where you’re out meeting new people. Some notable tips include going to support groups to meet other widows, not dating until you feel ready, and not talking about your late spouse on the first date. 

Hopefully, you can make use of them and enjoy some romance in your life.

Sources

Anja

Hey there, my name is Anja, I’ve seen and supported my mom’s incredible transformation in her fifties. Seeing how my mom “awakened” and took full control over her life really impressed me. I got inspired and started dreaming about how we could inspire more people, especially women, to open up and create a second life for themselves. That’s how the idea of aginggreatly.com came to life…

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